Taco Bell 2 Chilli Cheese Burrito Combo
Taco bell is the tastiest places ever. Nothing is ever bland tasting. These Chilli Cheese Burritos are definitely not bland either, but OH man do they look like shit. They're definitely not the most graceful meal. You feel like a total greaseball eating these sloppy tubes, but they taste amazing. Open it up, drizzle in a packet of hot sauce, and you're set. NOW... This is also the worst thing on their menu for you. At 380cal and 19g of fat per burrito, with 2 in the combo, you're gonna be packin on the chub, because this combo is unhealthy as shit. People are always saying how Taco Bell is THE WORST FOOD FOR YOU IT'S SO BAD FOR YOU. FUCK YOU PEOPLE. They have an entire Fresco menu, and it's actually delicious. They replace the cheese and sour cream with this TASTY ASS Pico De Gallo, and it's still super good. TRUST ME ON THIS ONE, OKAY? So... If you wanna live the tasty life, but are watching your figure, check out the Fresco menu. But if you wanna life the tasty life, and don't care about being a fat fuck, EAT THESE.

A&W Buddy Burger w/ Chz
So this morning, I drive my woman to work, cause it's my day off, and she's all "Stop at A&W before work, I'm hungry". Whenever she says this, I get excited. A&W makes some of the best fast food burgers around. Don't even get me started on the Cheddar Bacon Uncle Burger... THAT THING IS A MASTERPIECE OMG. Anyways, back to the buddy chz. It's fuckin' delish. This picture probably does no justice because it was taken in my car, and it is snowing and dark outside, so whatever. But for real, A&W knows how to make a burger. They always put stuff on the top AND BOTTOM bun. Burger King is the fucking worst for piling everything on top of the meat, and the bottom bun just turns into this flap of meat soaked bread. But I still love BK. NO HATE ON THE KING... ANYWAYS... back to the buddy chz. It's simple. Mustard, ketchup, and onions on the bottom. But this ain't no regular onions. These are sweet juicy grilled onions. They make this burger perfect. People who are like "oooh I don't like onions", can eat these, and be like, "I WAS SADLY MISTAKEN". Then you got the meat, the processed cheese, and then some wonderfully creamy mayo, and the top bun. The bun is slightly toasted, but super soft and good. Plus, these babies are 2 for $4.50 right now, so you can't go wrong. They're just little gaffers, so you gotta get 2. Unless you're not really that hungry, or really poor, then only get one.

McDonalds Steak 'n Egg Bagel
Okay, so this is the second part to my double-poster today. Also, to tell the truth I ate this like, a week ago, so I don't have my own picture. Unlike the McBites, this looks NOTHING like the picture. But I remember everything about it because IT WAS HORRIBLE. Oh man... Okay... So, I had my doubts about getting steak from McDonalds, but whatever, I like to try new items whenever available. So I ordered this and after getting it, I head into my van to eat it. I open this shit up, and bite it and my teeth almost fell out. I don't know what the fuck McDonalds used to cook their bagels, but they turn into cement. Like, this sandwich wouldn't even be so bad if it wasn't served in between two ceramic tiles. It's exactly like their BLT bagel. I dunno how that's a permanent item because only idiots buy that shit. ANYWAYS BACK TO THE TOPIC AT HAND. After hurting my mouth on the bagel, I decide to eat just the toppings. I open it up, and contrary to the picture, the steak part is like, a third of the size. It was tasty though, had steak sauce on it, and like, 4 sauteed onions; not enough but whatever. The cheese was cheesy, and the folded egg thing was gross by itself. This thing whole sandwich was fucking stupid actually. Thank god it's limited time only cause I don't wanna see it on the menu anymore. Seriously, if they just like, put the steak puck and the onions on their McMuffin platform, it would be delicious. The McMuffin eggs are real and good, and the english muffin has always had an awesome texture. BUT UNTIL THEY TAKE MY ADVICE, DON'T EAT THIS SHIT. Unless you like really hard bagels, then eat it you dummy.

McDonalds Chicken McBites

Alright, so this is my first post. I'm gonna do a double-poster today to kick off my dumb blog. To fill you in, I'm probably going to take a picture of every item I eat when I do a review about it, however today I ate these before I decided to start a blog so THIS WILL HAVE TO DO. Honestly though, these looks exactly like the McPicture. These have been available in the states for a while, and FINALLY they're in Canada. They're good too. The chicken is the same as McNugs, but the breading is WAY BETTER. McNugs have this fuckin, crusty bland coating that sucks, and I only every buy them when McMonopoly forces me to choose between Nugs and Big Macs to get the little monopoly pieces, which you never win anything anyways because it's gay... Anyways, these McBites have what they call a "homestyle coating". Totally awesome, and they keep moist. Also, they come with your choice of "Hot Habanero" or "Cool Ranch". Hot Habanero is actually pretty spicy, and Cool ranch is, well, it's fuckin ranch. But The Habanero surprised me. Didn't think McDonalds would ever have the balls to have something spicy on the menu. Oh well. Anyways, these are good, so eat 'em because it's LIMITED TIME ONLY NIGGUHzz. Also, if you're a pussy, don't get the habanero dip.